Gaming wasn’t a focal point in the Jones family until Christmas Day 1990 when a young yet mature beyond his years Dick Jr. woke up to not a sock of coal, but an Amstrad 6128 plus. What’s that you say, you don’t know what an Amstrad is? It was a 8-bit home computer that also, thankfully, played video games. For my first review, it would stand to reason for me to choose the first video game I ever played, Batman: The Movie. Batman…(grabs shoulders) you…. are my number one… guy!
The title screen may oversell the graphics on this. Lower your expectations!
I was fortunate that St. Nick had already set up the computer for me. Thanks pal! Like the gentlemen in Gotham Museum I was going to broaden my mind. I switched both the keyboard and monitor on. Beside it, a stack of games were placed. One box that stood out was the Hollywood Collection. This was a collection of 4 games based on late 1980s movies, some of these I’ll get to another day. I decided to pick Batman. As a child, who wouldn’t? It’s Batman! Then I typed a line that would forever change my life.
Run"disc
Developed and published by Ocean Software, the game has 5 levels based on the 1989 blockbuster. We play through the Batman’s initial confrontation with Jack Napier at Axis Chemicals until its climax atop Gotham Cathedral where you dance with the devil in the pale moonlight and finally defeat the Joker. Apologies for spoiling a 34 year old movie, I will try to keep reviews on future video games based on movies spoiler free (unless the movie is over 35 years at least).
Jack Napier meet Vat of Chemicals. Vat of Chemicals meet Jack Napier.
While the first and fifth level are 2D levels scrolling through Axis Chemicals and climbing up Gotham Cathedral respectively, the developers offer great variety in just five levels. The game allows you get behind the wheel of the Batmobile evading Joker’s goons through Gotham’s traffic, and later flying the Batwing as you free balloons filled with Smylex into the night’s sky. Between these a palate cleanser in the shape of a match 3 game to discover what cosmetics are laced with Smylex. The game keeps you on your toes through this constant gameplay changes ensuring you are never bored with the game as you progress.
Racing through Gotham. You may question the layout of the city after you play this level.
While scrolling, you need to avoid enemy gunfire and enemies throwing chemicals bombs at you. While driving you need to avoid cars bumping Into you and banging into the footpaths. While flying the you need to avoid helicopters and exploding balloons. Apart from damage from falling large heights, the Cathedral offers two other points of damage, rats and spikes on the floor. While the enemy types are limited, they are tweaked to their visuals of the enemies at that stage of the movie. For example, the enemies with guns in Axis Chemicals, now resemble Joker goons in the Cathedral. This makes each level look and feel different even.
Joker's Goons ready to be ambushed
For its time, the game looked gorgeous and honestly, it holds up better than most from the 8-bit era. The visuals borrow heavily from Tim Burton’s Gotham City. However, the game does have visual faults. While Batman looks like a Batman, he just doesn’t look like Michael Keaton’s Batman. This is only obvious to anyone who has seen any promotional material for the movie, so no one right? Right? In reality, it doesn’t take away from the game apart from the initial shock that quickly subsides. It is a rare occasion where you can forgive an obvious oversight as it would be a Knightmare (sorry) to play as Batman where you wouldn’t see any of the finer details of the character model had he dressed all in black. This was the 8-bit era so some leeway should be allowed. I could point to other versions on superior hardware that have more cinema sins than this.
Batman seconds from changing Jack Napier's life.
Listening to the music in isolation, you’d be forgiven for not knowing this was the soundtrack for Batman: The Movie video game. This bears no resemblance to either Danny Elfman's or Prince’s work. I apologise for breaking the news that you have no chance of hearing Partyman when you play. Point deducted. The game’s soundtrack holds a certain charm and you’ll be humming long after playing.
Flying the Batwing freeing balloons
You may notice that I haven’t spoken about the difficulty of the game. It may come as a surprise to some, but I was terrible at the game when I first played it. Remember, I was a young successful business executive who was gunned down in my prime by a rogue cyborg only a few years earlier. I was also playing a video game for the first time, holding a controller (a D-pad and 2 whole buttons) for the first time and playing Batman: The Movie game for the first time. It was a lot to take in. My Batman didn’t get the chance to throw Jack Napier into a vat of chemicals for a long while. In fact the first enemy of my first game was able to walk across the screen, literally climb down the ladder, and finally aim a gun and hit me before I was able to move.
Recreation of my first effort at playing where all I needed to do is press 'fire' here. I ended up losing health!
The game follows a system. There are no rogue enemy placements and if you learn by repetition you will be rewarded. The only change replaying this is what cosmetics to choose in level 3.
Figuring out what chemicals are laced with Smylex
With my confidence increasing with each new game started, like Neo in the Matrix I was beginning to believe. Sensing patterns I realised I knew what I should be doing, although I still made rookie errors. I began to edge that bit further ahead and press a bit further again. You can sleep soundly in your beds tonight knowing that I ended Joker’s reign of terror by smacking a batrope off him while he climbed the Jokerropeladder (I imagine the name of the helicopter rope ladder based on every other name convention in the Batman Universe) and condemning him to a quick visit to street level. Again sorry for spoiling this movie for that one person who likes Batman and never saw the 1989 classic before reading this.
Spoiler: How the game and movie ends. I wrote spoiler, this is your fault!
The game is short when you finally remember the pattern of events, less than 30 minutes from start to finish. It takes a good while to remember the placements but once you do the challenge lessens. Some of you reading this might think something lasting 30 minutes may be a knock, it’s about the journey and not the destination. The journey to perfection is way more than 30 minutes so don’t expect to have it done in your first few hours.
Should you play it? Absolutely. Am I suggesting you go and buy an Amstrad and Batman: The Movie game right now? No, but if you know a friend you has an Amstrad (extremely rare) or know how to acquire one, I would encourage you to indulge your curiosity. I was blessed my first steps into gaming were with such a memorable game. Perhaps had I played something else, I wouldn’t be the fictional character poster you see today discussing games.
Excelsior! (I know where that comes from, I’m just checking if you are still paying attention)
Batman: The Movie video game and review completed so there is nothing left to say than
"All hail the new king in town
Young and old, gather 'round
Black and white, red and green
The funkiest man you've ever seen
Tell you what his name is
Dick Jones! Dick Jones!"
